Toxins My flesh is tender, my flesh is green, I smoke wreathes of nightshade fumes, And as far as in the depths of my sterile alloy, they flow… I inhale…and everything turns dim, almost raw… Even though I die, my eyes so dark audaciously shudder. I am meticulously unlike the world, My chlorophyll silhouette, My vegetal substance makes me so fragile against the breezes, And within my sphere of aquatic fields, I take body, I doze off… There goes the soft tyranny of my verdant soul… Like a blunt melopee, once again I inhale… And the poisonous smoke invades my veins… I can trace it trickling towards my core with its legion of milky butterflies. I want to resist its lactide skies, Too tired to try, I often surrender. It’s a torturous tune contaminating my brain, Its echo pirouettes and rolls back in Like a parasite feeding on my low serotonin… Sisterly smoke, you bait my anxiety And gradually fuel my nervosity. Inhale some more…and the icy monoxide, like pink peppercorns rampaging my skin… I can’t escape its seduction, like a love imbued with dysfunctions, I need more nicotine…
I have struggled to tame my nicotine addiction but often thought it allowed me a glimpse into complicated it can be to steer ourselves away from something we know does us harm.
Have you found your way out of the pull of nicotine? Share your strategies below please!
Wonderful piece, Mya.
Your descriptions are so evocative and vivid.
I will start this by saying IT WAS NOT EASY, but I gave up weed, cigarettes, and alcohol because as much as one part of me very much loved these things the other part of me — which lost this battle for 15 years but has now been winning for the last 3 years — just knew I had to stop before I lost myself completely.
I don’t really have any tips though other than, I was lucky to get sober with my friend who also got sober around the same time. That helped a lot.
Now I want a cigarette.